Miscarriage.......

As most of you know from my Instagram post I suffered a miscarriage last week. I was about 5 weeks give or take. The whole experience, even though I know there is always good in every situation, has pretty much sucked ass!

I wanted to share my story for a few reasons:

It is therapeutic for me. I know a lot of people just don't share their story but i feel like people need to talk about this a bit more. Women should talk openly about their miscarriages. It happens so frequently infact 1 in 4 women suffer a miscarriage and is such a normal part of being a women, but hardly anyone talks about it or even acknowledges it. For me I want to talk about it. I want other women to know its ok to talk about.

So last week i found out I was pregnant after months and months of trying to fall pregnant with baby number 2. We thought yeah we will fall pregnant straight away again little did we know it would take time. My husband was away when I found out so I face-timed him straight away and showed him that bright pink line. We where both so excited!

A week later i go to the toilet and see bright pink spots! I figured it would be ok because I bled when I was early pregnant with Brandon. I just figured i would have my ultrasound and we would see that little sack with a strong heart beat. I called my high-risk ob because of my complications last time I am now a high risk patient. She advised my levels where extremely low and it would be very likely I was miscarrying my heart just broke. She said if the bleeding stopped i was to go get another blood test in the morning to see if my levels where rising.

The bleeding didn't stop infact it just got worse as the night went on. I called my ob again the next morning and i explained i was now passing clots and i was sure i was miscarrying which she confirmed.

I stayed home from work and I basically just cried all day I couldn't even bring myself to eat any food because I was so emotionally hurting. I drove to the beach and I sat in my car for probably an hour. That helped clear my head!

No one can ever prepare you for the pain emotionally and physically. We had started to pick out names I was sure we where having a girl because this pregnancy just felt so different. It was feeling so real. Then in a flash it was over.

I've walked away from this with a positive mind set. This has happened for a reason, this has happened because there wasn't something quite right with this little one. This little one wasn't prepared to come into the world and the time just wasn't right our next baby though will be perfect! I know soon we will be pregnant again and I will love every second of the pregnancy. I've given myself time. I have cried alot of tears but i have turned a corner and feeling so much better!

I have surrounded myself with some amazing people! I have had so much support from some amazing other mothers as well as my family. I definitely could not have got through it without my husband!

No matter what anyone says it doesn't make it any easier. So many people have reached out and shared their story with me. That's one of the reasons I needed to share my story!

Pennies For Princess P

I met Emily on Friday her daughter Penelope is four months old. We met at the Newcastle Babes + Picnics which I am the ambassador for. When I found out about P having cancer i knew I needed to help her! But how would I help......So I thought the best way would start a go fund me account for her medical expences. I asked Emily to tell me about her.

P is the greatest thing that has ever happened to me, she is the light of my life I would be completely lost without her.  

Penelope was born with a bruised lump on her back, which become bigger over time. I remember constantly feeling that something wasn't quite right so I decided to have it checked out. But everywhere I went nobody would listen to me and I kept getting told that she has reflux, colic, constipation etc. Over time Penelope was getting progressively worse. On the 4th of October we saw our local health nurse who was extremely concerned about P’s distended stomach and told us to get to the hospital ASAP.

Six weeks ago Penelope was diagnosed with Rhabdomyosarcoma (RMS). RMS is a cancerous tumour that originates in the soft tissues of the body, including the muscles, tendons, and connective tissues it is very rare, on average there are only 17 cases per year. In Penelope’s case her tumour began developing in the womb and continued to rapidly grow up to 15cm over her short life. The cause of Rhabdomyosarcoma is unknown, it develops in most cases sporadically, with no known risk factors. The survival rates depend on where the tumour is located and if the cancer has spread. If the disease hasn’t spread, five-year survival rates are around 70 to 80%.

With RMS the treatment consists of chemotherapy, surgery and radiation. Due to her age the doctors have ruled out radiation. As Penelope’s tumour is so large major surgery is required, however her specialists would prefer it to be reduced through chemotherapy. Penelope has already had one round of chemo and is currently on her second round and on December 21st she will have an MRI that will determine whether she has another round of chemo or surgery. Her doctors and specialists have informed me that chemotherapy will be continued for several months and up to 2 years after surgery to make sure any secondaries are killed off.

As Penelope needs support with feeding the products needed at home cost $658 a month. This includes giving sets, containers (need to be changed every 24 hours), Infatrini and calogen (promote catch up growth). Unfortunately due to the location of her tumour and chemo Penelope also has to use creams and take various different medications which can be quite costly.

It’s been a rough journey so far and we still have a long road ahead of us. I am determined to give my baby girl the best chance at life as I want her to develop and have the same experiences as other infants her age.

For a young single mum it’s a huge task… I am seeking your help to raise money for Penelope with the ongoing cost.

It broke my heart when Emily told her story to me. Im sure as you all read this you will feel the same. Please help Princess P. It doesn't matter how small or big the donation is every little bit will help this little family!

https://www.gofundme.com/penniesforprincessp

How to lose friends......have a baby

Within our group of friends, my husband and I where the second couple to have a child. Almost a year down the track, I can now look in such a short period and see how much my friendships have changed, particularly with my child-free friends. I may not have realized it right away but it’s definitely happened.

Where there’s any big life change whether its marriage, big move, or a switch in jobs friendships can be impacted. But there’s something about having kids that adds little extra something to the equation.  Sometimes it can be good, other times not so much. But what I’ve found to be true both for myself and from talking to friends is that most friendships post baby follow the same pattern:

• Pregnancy: when you’re pregnant with your first, it can all feel a bit surreal. You can’t get drunk every weekend, but you make the best designated driver, so it’s all good. While you can be a bit preoccupied with what’s to come, there’s no actual baby to take care of yet, so there’s still plenty of time for friends and their lives.

• Newborn: So much is involved in taking care of a newborn it can quickly take over all aspects of your life. You might not realize how far down the baby hole you’ve fallen. Everything seems to be about the baby, mostly because it is. You’re up all hours, doing what feels like a billion more loads of laundry, changing nappies, dealing with postpartum hormones, and marveling over this little creature that came out of your body. Your exhausted and can’t muster up any will to go out! Soon your friends stop inviting you to things since you can’t make it anyways.

This period of parenting can be simultaneously wonderful and isolating as hell. Child-free friends don’t want to always talk about the baby (totally understandable!!). But since he or she has been the focus of your recent life, it can be hard to think of anything else to discuss, especially on a sleep-deprived brain.  Once your back to catching more sleep and the newborn fog has lifted, you should be able to talk about more than just your baby. Your friends will appreciate you for it!

Having a child changes your life in major ways. That’s obvious. But one thing you might not expect, or totally be prepared for is how having a baby will influence your friendships, especially those friends who may not be in the same life stage. After all your mind is focused on things like nappies, strollers, and that tiny wonderful creature you are desperately trying to keep alive. Meanwhile, your friends still have time to binge-watch an entire season of Pretty Little Liars in one sitting or meeting up for bottomless brunch and not worrying about when your baby will need his or her next sleep or when they need to be fed!

Having a baby has taught me that not all friendships, even long-term ones are supposed to be forever. Not all friendships are healthy for me.

Some friends are only meant to be in your life for a period of time, and once you have children and your perspective and priorities change, those old friends and their values or priorities don’t necessarily match yours anymore.

For a friendship to work, there must be some give and take, and we need to show interest in each other’s lives. The difficulty comes when we have a baby because while we still understand our friend’s life, they can no longer understand ours. This is the most common reasons for a friendship breakup after a baby. It stems from us not having as much time to invest in our friends and not being as interested in their issues or events as we once were.

Im not saying that there is definitive end of relationships, and when those child free friends eventually go down the path of having kids I hope they see things from my perspective and come back into my life.

Although some of my friendships have drifted away I’ve also made some amazing new friendships with some amazing ladies who are going down the same life path as me and those friendships I will cherish forever.

Whatever you have shreddies

Whatever you have shreddies

The last few days I’ve been thinking long and hard about what I can give Brandon for snacks as well as finger foods that are not full of crap!

This morning I was going through the fridge, looking at a stack of vegetables that were days away from being ready for the garbage bin, and then it hit me.. Its time for Brandon to try vegetable shreddies.. Problem solved.

Im not going to lie I tried one and it was delicious!!!

They are so simple and easy, you can use any vegetables you like.

Ingredients:

Broccoli

Zucchini

Parsnip

Cheese (optional)

2 eggs

1 TBSP Plain Flour

Coconut Oil (for frying)

Method:

1.       Grate all ingredients and put into a bowl with the eggs and flour.

2.        Heat the coconut oil in a pan (medium heat).

3.       Place spoonful’s of the mixture into the pan and flatten with a spatula.

4.       Cook for a few minutes on each side or until golden brown.

5.       Serve cold or warm

Enjoy!

Finding Nemos Dinner 

xx

Guest Blog - Candice Williams - The Working Mumma Holly Shit Im a Mum And I Love It

I first started following "The Working Mumma" a few months ago and I seriously fell in love with all of her posts and her blog. I thought to myself her and I are so similar....... She became my little insta mumma crush.....Don't act like we don't all have another mummy crush out there, because we all do!

I finally got up the courage to send her a private message on Instagram. When she replied I though oh my gosh shes actually replied to me! Shes as awesome as her blog is. So I asked her to write a guess blog for me, so all of you can get to know Candice and enjoy her updates as much as I do. 

She gladly said yes!
So have a read below with what she has to say about being a first time mum!

Holy shit! I am a mum... And I love it!

I am that annoying person who just won't shut the hell up about their baby when they are asked, "how's the baby?" I just keep going on and on about how magical the love is, how precious they are and just how amazing motherhood really is! I see the other person's eyes glaze over, I ignore it and just keep rambling. What. The. Hell. Who is this person? And what has she done with Candice?!

Let's rewind to even 18 months ago, JUST before William was conceived. I wasn't sure I wanted kids. We were trying, but to be honest, I thought I could be okay if it didn't happen. We had a lot of trouble falling pregnant, my fiancé was more distressed about it than I was. I would hear co-workers or close friends talk about their children and I legit thought, who on EARTH would want that.

I would wake up from a big night out at 1pm with a hangover, just wanting maccas and the thought would cross my mind... What happens if I had to get up to a baby in this state?? HELL NO! No more sleep ins? Haha no. Feeling this guilt you 'apparently' feel? No thanks, honey. I won't be THAT emotionally invested in my kids, it's not natural and obsessive. I felt sorry for my friends with kids. Don't get me wrong I LOVE kids and LOVED being around my friend's baby/toddlers/children, I was just so turned off by the whole lifestyle.

I know why I felt like this, it was because I didn't know, I wasn't aware of the addiction and love you are overcome with when you have a baby. The love is like no other.

These days I don't crave big nights out, I crave cuddles on the couch with my baby and baby daddy. The guilt feeling? I welcome it. Emotionally invested in my baby? I am balls deep. Obsessed with William? Omg he takes up every thought, even dream, every second of the day... And you know what? I wouldn't change it for anything. This mummy lifestyle? I LOVE IT. I love the early starts, love the late finishes. I love the mummy community. I love it so much. The love you receive the second your baby is born grows and multiples every hour, until you are left loving this tiny human with your whole being and more, in just a few short days.

I am that mum who tells their childless friends not to be scared of it, embrace it! Because it's the best time of your life. And I see them politely smile and give me that look - she's a bat shit crazy mum. She's sooo far gone that there's no saving her now. And you know what? They are right. There is no saving me. I am already saved, by my family.

This secret mumlife world is AMAZING. It CERTAINLY has it's moments, hours and even days, at times, but that addiction you have for you baby keeps you going. That love feeling is the strongest drug in the whole world.

I am 100% positive I am not the only one who has felt like this pre-kids. My pre-baby self would be mortified if they knew that I cried about not being able to breastfeed, that I was obsessed with tracking my baby's poo-y nappies, that I trade the girls night outs with lots of fancy clothes and delicious drinks for brunch catch ups with my mummy friends drinking a hot chocolate. They would be mortified to know I cried sometimes because I am so happy, I cry sometimes just smelling my baby, I cry sometimes because I feel blessed with this life.

I loved my pre-baby life, I had SO much fun and don't regret it. But this life is the best one, the life I would choose ten thousand times over without even a thought.

If only we could show our pre-baby self a picture of our life now? I would show me a picture of me breastfeeding William with Kyle sitting next to me. I would tell her that this would be the happiest time of my life. What would your picture look like?

Love,

Candice x

Ricotta Balls

Today I really wanted to make Brandon something different as I’m sure his getting bored of the foods I’ve been feeding him lately. So I experimented a bit and made him some Ricotta Balls.

Ingredients:

200g Fresh Ricotta

1 Tbsp dried oregano

Tin Diced Tomatoes

1 Tbsp tomato paste

1 crushed garlic

*Note: The reason I use these tomatoes is because they are just tomatoes nothing added

Method:

1.       Pre-heat oven 160 degrees

2.       Line baking tray with baking paper

3.       Mix ricotta and oregano together

4.       Once well combined roll into balls, I made mine fairly small but you can make them as big or as small as you desire.

5.       Put them in the oven for 20 minutes or until heated through.

6.       Meanwhile in a small saucepan combine the tinned tomato, tomato paste and garlic and heat.

7.       Once the Ricotta balls are heated remove from the oven and serve topped with sauce as a side dish.

He really enjoyed them. To round out his dinner I served them with some chicken for extra protein. As well as some steamed vegetables that I chopped up.

Enjoy!

Finding Nemos dinner xx

Mixed Chicken With Cinnamon

I thought I would share a go to meal I make for Brandon that I generally keep in the freezer for those nights where Brent and I are having something he won’t eat. Like a curry!

I don’t really like to give him packaged foods if I can avoid it because some of them are high in sugar and I like to know what I am putting into my baby’s body!

Now to cook everything and blend I always use my Bellini but you can use a pot of water instead.

Mixed Chicken with Cinnamon

4 Chicken Thigh Filets

Half a Sweet potato

1 Potato

1/2 Cup Kent Pumpkin

Half a Zucchini

4 Broccoli

1 Cup of Quinoa (I cook this separately and add it to the puree)

1-2 teaspoons of Cinnamon

This made about 10 meals for him so I'm stocked up for a while.

Brandon Seems to really enjoy it well for now anyways till he decides he wants something else.

I like to give Brandon lots of protein with his dinner to keep him full for longer that’s why there is so much chicken in my recipe.

I also don’t give him any fruit after dinner because of the sugar content in fruit I always give him his fruit in the morning after breakfast and after lunch. It’s just something I find works better for Brandon.

I generally use the Heinz containers which i just picked up from my local Woolworths. They are easy to use as well as being great for space if you don't have much space like me!

http://www.heinzforbaby.com.au/

Enjoy mums and dads!

Big love

Finding Nemos Dinner

xx